Parenting Tip: Anxiety
Anxiety is on the rise. In fact, one in eight kids suffers from significant anxiety. Remember worry and anxiety are different. Worry is normal and doesn’t interfere with everyday life and can actually lead to solving a problem. Anxiety can very much interfere with everyday life and can cause avoidance or panic.
Parenting a child with anxiety can be quite the ride. My biggest tip is to let them have their moment. Yes, you want to take it away. But saying things like, “You need to figure this out” or “Try and move on,” are damaging comments. They need to feel what they are feeling. God gave us all of the emotions. They are not all bad and typically happen with good reason. A lot of times, strong emotions revolving around anxiety are valid. When a child gets permission to feel all of the feels, they can actually move on faster.
Sharing the truth with your child is super helpful. The truth of the struggle AND the truth of the solution. For example, if your child is scared of the dark they can say “I am really scared when I am in the dark (truth), I am not alone because God is with me and can help me (truth).” Or if you have a child anxious about a situation at school they can say “I am anxious about _______ (truth), God help me see what you might be teaching me and give me the courage to trust you through this (truth)!”
Talking through what is making a child feel anxious can be very helpful, especially if you can try and get to the root of the issue. Asking questions to get clarification can help you see what is really going on in their heart.
Praying for God’s peace over your child invites Him in and reminds you and your child that He is bigger than our emotions and can provide what is needed. There are grounding techniques, coping skills and other helpful tools that are certainly helpful! Kids can and should be equipped with these excellent tools. The most powerful tool in my humble opinion is prayer.
Research shows one of the best predictors of a kid's success in life is having at least one consistent, supportive, and caring adult in their lives. Parents, be involved. Listen to your child and offer help when they struggle. Show that you care. Realize that anxiety can seem like a monster, but we know the all powerful God who can take care of His children and fight against any monster trying to steal our kids' joy. And remember, let them feel what they are feeling.
by: Cady Ruth Sentell, Children’s Minister